Thanks for being here!
It seems recently there has been an influx of people I’m coming across in various social media settings, who decry injustices that are seemingly being inflicted upon them as a result of…equal rights.. Its strange, confusing and appalling all at the same time In this past week I fielded a thread (explained in my previous blog post) about how women lie about being raped. This thread evolved (or is that devolved?) into hill of comments built upon slut shaming. Next came a post or reposting rather of a blog written by Suzanne Venker, “niece of Phylis Schafly & FOX News correspondent” about the “war on men.” I went back and forth about replying to this posting but decided rather than start a flame war which would result in no one listening to each other (Internet-wise) I’d post something else on a related topic & comment on that so those that know me got a clearer idea of my views. Lead by example, I’ll let you know how that works out for me……
But since this is my pwn personal space I can explain and respond to the article in question.
So Suzanne Venker whose website lists her as an “author and social critic” writes books. Her latest is entitled “The War On Men” and under the header advertising that are several blog pieces covering a range of topics such as gender roles in modern marriage, the “luxury” of at home motherhood and how fathers roles in society are devalued. Dont get me wrong I believe these issues are alive and well in modern day United States…just not from the angle she’s throwing at. The initial quote I read by her stated “you’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.”
Recently I had someone I know post an article about a female that accused a man of rape & then retracted. The thread that followed comprised of: curse words, slut shaming and generalizations about how women “all lie” about rape and put “innocent men” in prison. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely believe there are people on death row for murders they didn’t commit as a result of faulty eyewitnesses and the like, but….rape is a bit of a different story in terms of the proof needed to prosecute. Rarely are there “eyewitness” and mostly whats relied on are DNA obtained from a rape kit which is a very invasive exam that frankly a woman probably wouldn’t endure just to scare a man. Additionally, getting a rape conviction would involve either one of two things: evidence of a rape or confession of a crime (or a plea bargain) . I find it highly unlikely either of things would occur without guilt but alas who am I? The aforementioned “thread” in this case was almost entirely comprised of male voices who I cant imagine truly understand the ramifications of prosecuting a rape conviction, thus those same voices alluding that “a lot of women lie” show their own ignorance in laying down such claims. The irony of this claim lies in its ignorance. The fact of the matter is that statistically most rapes are not reported. Not because they didn’t happen but because most women DON’T want to endure an rape exam and a trial where their reputation will be torn apart. This doesn’t make them less innocent or their attacker less guilty, it just is the truth of the matter. Just my two cents out here in my own space.
Post note: and to be fair, yes I acknowledge there have been and are women who lie about being raped. However these cases quickly become undone once its discovered whats involved in prosecuting the claim of rape. (my opinion) In certainly dont think its a regular “thing” among women that they would choose this path lightly or en masse just to be vindictive. (again, my opinion, as a human being and a person with thirty seven years experience as a woman)